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There’s no water in our apartment.. neither of us know why, either, but it makes it awfully tough to take a shower or get ready for work when you can’t brush your teeth. ^^;; I also woke up really thirsty because of all of the chocolate that I ate last night.. >.>;; Weeeeeell…. I guess this is to waiting for water… *hums* Dude, I don’t want to go to work today… would anybody mind if I just left Japan and only came back to visit? ^.^;; That’s what I feel like. I feel like that pretty much every morning that I have to get up and go to work. I’d rather just vacation. ^^;;
Nyaaaa….. it would be nice not being lonely, too.. >.>;; It sucks being lonely here, and being so far from my friends.. I’m looking into a new job, though who knows how probable that will be. ^.^; It would just be nice to have a job that didn’t bore me to death. Not that it’s a bad job, it’s just boring as all hell for me. If I had a friend that I saw on a daily basis, it would probably be a lot better.. or a good friend at my branch.. *nods* That would rock! Hmmmm… wonder if I can transfer to Nicole or Eda’s branch.. *ponders*
I used dude a lot back then, didn’t I? Two weeks to the day into my new life in Japan, and 50 weeks shy of the year that I was signed up for, I was starting to become miserable. That was my livejournal entry from September 29, 2004, and it reflected my mindset. I’d been at my new job for a week, and it was already starting to become routine. Before I started the job, my roommates had warned me that it would become boring quickly, but I’d thought that that meant that the job would be easy, and I wouldn’t have to use a lot of brainpower to do it well, thereby reserving a lot of brainpower for things outside of work, like learning numbers in Japanese.
I was wrong, though. I was so wrong. The boredom actually meant that by the time that I was done spending seven hours at work, my brain was accustomed to not having to think a lot. I would wander home in a haze, and not want to do anything outside of work. I began to stay home a lot (and I was only a week in), and that brought into stark relief just how many friends I didn’t have. I got really lonely, really fast, and started wondering if I could just go home and call this a failed experiment.
There was a problem, though. Nova offered new employees a cash advance to help with your first month here until the regular paychecks started coming in. The advance would be taken slowly out of your future paychecks. I’d taken it, and so now, if I quit, I would have to pay it back, and it wasn’t like I had money just laying around.
The next day, September 30th, I followed up with this post:
Mmmm, more rambling thought. I really need to decide on how long I’m going to stay here too. Japan has it’s appeals, and I know that I’m just lonely here, but I dunno.. I don’t want to live here forever. I’ve decided that I’ll have to stick it through for 2 months and then I can decide, no matter how much I want to run before that. I’ve been wanting to leave a lot, but… No.. I was told that the average length of employment at NOVA is 8 months, because most people come for one school year and then want to go back. I’m thinking that I may possibly do that too, and save up money for the return to school in America.
As far as returning to America, I know for sure that I want to go back to school when I come back. I don’t know what I want, though.. That will be the purpose of my research. I’ve thought about being an archaeologist, and that might be fun, or possibly a paleontologist. Anything that deals with ancient species and civilizations would be interesting. I’d like something that stimulates my brain, also, and something that doesn’t really work with the public at large. So, definitely scientist-something is on my top list of things to become. There’s also the space station thing to think about, which is quietly burning in the back of my head most of the time.
*coughs* Enough about that.. I’m just getting my thoughts out and giving myself something else to think about. Speaking of that, I need to get ready for work.
It’s no surprise that I was thinking about going back to school. I love learning, and school has always been a positive place for me. I’m lucky in that respect, and I’ll always be a lifelong learner! I used to want to be an archaeologists/paleontologist, or an astronaut, or an animator, and I did really well in school (national Honors society, etc). But when it came time to choose what college to go to, I took a whole year to decide. It was a hard choice. Should I study math, or dinosaurs? Or ancient civilizations? I couldn’t be an astronaut, because there were height limits and I’d already passed them by fifth grade, though they have been lifted now, I believe! Can you believe that being tall is actually a disadvantage at times? And I’m not just talking about finding pants. In the end, I looked at what I could live without in my life. Could I live without doing science every day, or could I live without art every day? The answer was easy, then. I’d like to study science someday, but what I want around my life every day is art. What I want to do the most with my life is make art. Therefore, I went to an art college, but love of science was still strong in me.
Um.. so, anyways, it’s no surprise that I was bent on going back to school after coming back. So why, when I was so miserable, did I stay nine years in Japan? It was because I stuck it out, found what happiness I could, and then something extraordinary happened, and suddenly I wanted to stay in Japan forever.
Any idea what it was? The answer is simpler than you think! 😉